When we all start a project, we figure it to be easy enough. I like to call it the “I Got This Syndrome”. Yet, we stumble, fall, somebody pokes fun, and then we are officially stressed and ready to give up! This though…this is truly the precious moments in life that we take for granted. These are the moments that make us into who we are supposed to be.
No one can ever truly understand what happens behind closed doors. Even if you tell someone they put their own imagination or “twist” on it. Then your life, your troubles, your achievements just become a play in their mind. if you think about it, that is a mockery to you. they can laugh at your troubles, no? add whatever lies they want, no? Then the only other option is to suppress every feeling. Happy, sad, upset, hurt, excited, hungry, etc. Yet, is that not also bad for the emotional and physical well being of a person also?
As a senior in college, I can relate to that “I Got This Syndrome”. As finals quickly approach the pressure builds to quickly grasp for something that never was mine. Between internships, senior projects that are due last week, and starting shots. I begin to sink into a bottomless pit. Then I went down memory lane. During these last 6 years in college (yes, I said 6) I have been diagnosed with Multiple sclerosis, had 10 boyfriends, 3 relapses, made straight As and Bs, and kept it a secret the whole time from my friends and classmates. Then BAM…LIGHTBULB!
I am still loading! If you truly take a deeper look at it, that is what makes a person. I am not a genius, cause if so I would already be graduated. That project? Will it make me a better social worker? No. I will get it done though. All the falls in life. All the achievements. All the laughs. All the dropping Starbucks cups in public. All the messed up words and incomplete thoughts. All the falling in public. It builds you up, tears you down. Makes you callused. Yet, then…only then… you learn to fight for survival! I do not have this, and I am proud of it! If I had it, I would not be me!
When things seem to start whirling around you, and you seem to be sinking, just take a step back. Take a breather, and remember that you can make it. Don’t ever forget it takes a ton of pressure to make a diamond, and inside everyone is a beautiful diamond! Me, I am special enough to have a HUGE diamond. Yet, this life is not over yet, it takes a while to load…. So hold on to your helmet, it is going to be a bumpy ride!